Deliniating themes here so far, that's all. I'll come back to all this again and again and again.

(1) political violence
(2) depression

You must examine, honestly and seriously, how and why these themes are so tightly wound together in you. This is the continuance of a pattern that's evolved since you were about four years old. How did you make it to forty? Only by looking away. You understand yourself very well Robert, and you'd understand yourself even better without your incessent, highly creative, ego-salvaging efforts to misunderstand yourself. Your ignorance is self-imposed.